7 Bollywood Sex Scenes That Were Anything But Sexy

1) Mithun Chakravarty and Sushmita Sen – Chingaari

Mithun plays the role of a godman who rapes Sushmita, a prostitute. Beware, the acting is louder than Sushmita’s “moans!”

Creepiest Moment: Mithun licking Sushmita’s back!

2) Sanjay Kapoor and Neha Dhupia – Julie

Sanjay and Neha are super awkward together! To be honest, anyone would be awkward if you wear a black leather jacket indoors! This has to be the most ‘desi’ couple ever because even though they have an entire mansion to themselves, they still prefer doing the foreplay in the car. 

Creepiest Moment: Sanjay ravishing Neha’s body which is covered with ‘I love you’s. 

3) Shahrukh Khan and Deepa Sahi – Maya Memsaab

This sex scene will surely leave you confused. On one hand there’s a completely uncensored shot of Deepa’s bare body, and yet on the other hand there are cut-scenes of neon lights and chain links. What’s the symbolism here? And oh, Edward Cullen could take quite a few lessons on biting a human from Deepa!

Creepiest Moment: Shahrukh having a climax so intense that he tears a pillow open.

4) Rekha and Navin Nishchol – Aastha

Aastha was a film which gained a lot of critical acclaim as well as commercial success. But sadly, this scene will just leave you terrified. Navin Nischol, who looks like he has a tomato for a head, is seen suckling on Rekha’s…. Fingers and toes! Close-ups of intertwined fingers, and a writhing Rekha suggest that they are having a good time, but it surely doesn’t seem so!

Creepiest Moment: Navin getting a taste of Rekha’s earwax. Yep.

5) Rajesh Khanna and Laila Khan – Waffa

First off, this song from the movie Waffa, features a lot of suggestive symbolism. Metaphors like the ice, popping into a champagne glass *wink wink*, and the champagne bottle squirting out some champagne *super wink*. Watching a superstar, well past his days, doing scenes like these will just break your heart.

Creepiest Moment: When you realize that Laila is probably young enough to be Rajesh Khanna’s granddaughter.

6) Rekha and Akshay Kumar – Khiladiyon Ka Khiladi

The scene opens with a heavily decked-up Rekha saying, “Even naughty girls need love, hain na?” If that hasn’t creeped you out, what follows next surely will. They proceed to do everything but actually having sex. Be it rolling around in some mud, showering together to wash away the mud (the makers didn’t really think this one through) or just singing some random Hinglish lyrics.

Creepiest Moment: Akshay slathering his hand with chocolate syrup, and Rekha gobbling it up. YUCK!

7) Tabu and Her Shaking Bed – Hawa

Tabu is raped by what seems to be the Indian Invisible Man. And no, we are not talking about Tusshar Kapoor here. This scene shows just how obsessed Bollywood is with the ‘intertwined-fingers-close-up’ whenever it comes to sex scenes. Even though the man cannot be seen, the filmmakers still show a close-up of Tabu closing her fingers together! 

Creepiest Moment: When you realize that this is the same actress who made Haider what it is.

Oh Bollywood, you never cease to amaze us!

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